Well my friends, January is over.
Which means we’ve all given up on resolutions, right?
If you’re still walking the straight and narrow ketogenic path, I salute you. Truly. But I also feel it is my duty as a baked-goods enabler to tell you that this cake might be the thing that knocks you clean off it. Gently. Lovingly. With cocoa and cream cheese.
Because here’s the thing: this red velvet marble loaf doesn’t care what time it is.
Can it be dessert for your Valentine? Yes.
Can it be breakfast? Also yes.
Can it be sliced thinly, eaten standing at the counter, and followed by the words “I’ll just have a bite”? Absolutely.
And with a few very important high altitude tweaks (less leavening, a little more flour—because the mountains demand respect), you are going to make everyone in your house fall in love with you. Even the cat.
(Please don’t feed it to her.)
I love a loaf cake because it feels low-pressure. No layers. No leveling. No “why is my cake leaning like it had a long night?” energy. Just one cozy pan, a dramatic red velvet swirl moment, and a thick slather of cream cheese frosting that forgives all sins—dietary and otherwise.
This cake is tender but sturdy, lightly chocolatey but not aggressive, and festive in a “February is doing her best” sort of way. It’s Valentine’s Day-adjacent without being pink and precious. It’s the cake you make when you want to show love but also want leftovers.
So let’s bake.
High Altitude Red Velvet Marble Loaf
with Cream Cheese Frosting
Ingredients
For the loaf:
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½ cup unsalted butter, softened
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¾ cup granulated sugar
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2 large eggs, room temperature
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½ cup sour cream (full fat, please)
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1 tsp vanilla extract
Dry ingredients:
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2 cups all-purpose flour (high altitude adjustment)
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1 Tbsp cornstarch
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1 tsp cocoa powder
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¾ tsp baking powder (reduced for altitude)
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½ tsp baking soda
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½ tsp salt
Red velvet swirl:
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1 Tbsp cocoa powder
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1 Tbsp milk
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1–2 tsp red food coloring (gel preferred)
Instructions
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Prep your pan & oven
Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease and line a 9x5 loaf pan with parchment, leaving an overhang for dramatic cake removal later. -
Cream butter & sugar
In a large bowl, beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy—about 2–3 minutes. This is not the time to rush. January already rushed us enough. -
Add eggs & dairy
Beat in eggs one at a time, scraping the bowl as needed. Mix in sour cream and vanilla until smooth. -
Mix dry ingredients
In a separate bowl, whisk together flour, cornstarch, cocoa powder, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. -
Combine
Add dry ingredients to wet ingredients and mix just until combined. Do not overmix. We want tender loaf, not emotional support bread. -
Create the marble magic
Scoop about ⅓ of the batter into a small bowl. Stir in the cocoa powder, milk, and red food coloring until smooth and gloriously red. -
Layer & swirl
Alternate spoonfuls of vanilla and red velvet batter into the loaf pan. Use a knife to gently swirl—think “romantic ribbon,” not “aggressive stirring.” -
Bake
Bake for 55–65 minutes, tenting loosely with foil after 45 minutes if the top browns too quickly. A toothpick should come out with a few moist crumbs. -
Cool
Let cool in the pan for 15 minutes, then remove to a rack to cool completely before frosting. (This is the hardest part. I believe in you.)
Cream Cheese Frosting
Ingredients
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4 oz cream cheese, softened
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2 Tbsp unsalted butter, softened
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1 cup powdered sugar
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½ tsp vanilla extract
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Pinch of salt
Instructions
Beat everything together until smooth, fluffy, and emotionally supportive. Spread generously over cooled loaf.
Final Thoughts From the Counter
This is the kind of cake that makes January feel forgiven and February feel hopeful. It’s cozy, a little indulgent, and completely unconcerned with your past intentions to “eat less sugar.”
Serve it to your Valentine. Serve it to yourself. Serve it with coffee in the quiet morning light while everyone else is asleep. And when your cat stares at you like she, too, would like a slice—tell her no, but thank her for the admiration.
Here’s to giving up on resolutions and saying yes to cake.























































