Since I’m on a comfort food kick here lately, you knew there was cake coming, right? I mean, what is more comforting than an easy chocolate sheet cake with chocolate frosting that is to die for and liberally doused in rainbow sprinkles (Ivy’s contribution to comfort town)? This is happiness in a pan, people. Whatever ails you, whatever existential crisis (or just tiny annoyance) you may be facing—this cake is the answer.

Did your dog ignore you all day despite you being the sole provider of treats and belly rubs? Cake.

Did you go to the grocery store for one thing and somehow leave with seventeen things except the one thing? Cake.

Did you forget your coffee in the microwave for the third time this morning? Cake.

Are you at high altitude and tired of sad, sunken cakes that taste like disappointment? FRIEND, YOU NEED THIS CAKE.

This recipe has been tweaked, tested, and sacrificed to the baking gods (RIP to a few flat, tragic attempts) to ensure it bakes up fluffy, rich, and perfect at high altitude. Plus, it’s a sheet cake, which means minimal effort and maximum reward. And the frosting? Oh, the frosting. It’s fudgy, glossy, and the kind of thing you might be tempted to eat straight from the bowl with a spoon. No judgment.

High Altitude Chocolate Sheet Cake

(Makes one 9x13-inch pan of pure joy)

Ingredients

For the cake:

• 2 cups granulated sugar

• 1 ¾ cups all-purpose flour

• ¾ cup unsweetened cocoa powder

• 1 ½ teaspoons baking powder

• 1 teaspoon baking soda

• 1 teaspoon salt

• 2 large eggs

• 1 cup buttermilk (or milk + 1 tbsp vinegar/lemon juice)

• ½ cup vegetable oil

• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract

• 1 cup hot water

For the fudgy chocolate frosting:

• ½ cup unsalted butter

• ⅓ cup unsweetened cocoa powder

• ¼ cup whole milk (or more as needed)

• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

• 2 ½ cups powdered sugar

And, of course:

• Rainbow sprinkles (the more, the merrier—this is not the time for restraint)

Instructions

1. Preheat & Prep

Preheat your oven to 350°F. Grease and flour a 9x13-inch baking pan. If you forget the flour part and your cake sticks, just frost the heck out of it and pretend it was intentional.

2. Mix the Dry Ingredients

In a large bowl, whisk together the sugar, flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Look at you, already winning.

3. Add the Wet Ingredients

Beat in the eggs, buttermilk, oil, and vanilla. Stir until it’s mostly combined, then pour in the hot water and mix until smooth. The batter will be thin, but that’s normal! Pour it into the prepared pan.

4. Bake

Bake for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out with just a few moist crumbs. Let it cool in the pan while you make the frosting.

5. Make the Fudgy Frosting

In a medium saucepan over low heat, melt the butter. Stir in the cocoa powder, then remove from heat and whisk in the milk, vanilla, and powdered sugar until smooth. Add more milk if needed for a spreadable consistency.

6. Assemble the Happiness

Spread the warm frosting over the slightly warm cake (this helps it settle into all the little cracks and makes it extra luscious). Immediately shower it with rainbow sprinkles—this is non-negotiable.

7. Enjoy

Grab a fork. Or don’t. No rules here.

This cake is everything a comfort dessert should be—chocolatey, easy, and best served in giant slabs with zero regard for portion control. It keeps well for a few days (if it lasts that long), and I highly recommend sneaking a piece for breakfast with your coffee. You deserve it.

So, whatever life is throwing at you today, know that you have a solution. It’s in your kitchen, it’s covered in sprinkles, and it’s about to make everything better.