Back-to-School Brownies: Espresso, Ganache & A Sprinkle Crisis.

Today is the kiddos’ first day back to school. College, that is. Which, can we just pause for a moment and acknowledge that I have college students? Two of them. Both still living at home (have you SEEN the price of rent in Colorado?), which is a win for me because A) I get to see them every day, and B) they still eat my food. I mean, that’s the dream, right? Raise them, feed them, send them into the world…and then have them boomerang back with their dirty laundry and hollow legs.

Anyway, because I’m a mom and because I can’t help myself, I decided to make them an after-school snack. Yes, I know they’re technically adults, but if you think that stops me from meeting them at the door with baked goods like it’s 1999, you’d be wrong. And since Miss Ivy is taking calculus this semester (and She. Is. Not. Happy.), I figured she needs some serious chocolate therapy. Honestly, I can’t blame her. I’m a words girl, not a numbers girl. Give me sentences, give me stories, give me endless rambling blog posts about baked goods—but please, for the love of butter, keep your derivatives and integrals away from me.

Unless we’re talking baker’s percentages, in which case I will whip out my scale and look very smug about it. But that’s basically fake math. Delicious math. And that, my friends, is the only kind I do.

So what’s a mom to do when calculus is looming and adulthood feels a little too adult-y? Cosmic brownies, but make them grown up. And by grown up, I mean thick, fudgy, laced with espresso powder, topped with a glossy layer of chocolate ganache, and buried under an avalanche of sprinkles. Because comfort food should feed you AND your inner child, am I right?

These Espresso Brownies with Chocolate Ganache and Sprinkles are basically the Voltron of desserts—strong on their own, but when they come together, they’re unstoppable. Deep, dark brownie base? Check. Rich ganache? Double check. A bazillion sprinkles? Oh yes, because adulthood is hard enough without denying yourself rainbow sugar confetti.

Let’s bake!

Espresso Brownies with Chocolate Ganache and Sprinkles

Ingredients:

For the brownies:

• 1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter

• 2 cups granulated sugar

• 4 large eggs

• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract

• 1 cup all-purpose flour

• 1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder

• 1 tablespoon espresso powder

• 1/2 teaspoon salt

• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder

For the ganache:

• 1 cup heavy cream

• 8 ounces semi-sweet chocolate, chopped (or use chips if that’s what you’ve got)

• 1 tablespoon unsalted butter (for shine)

For the top:

• ALL the sprinkles your heart desires (seriously, measure with your soul)

Instructions:

1. Preheat & prep: Heat your oven to 350°F (175°C). Line a 9x13-inch pan with parchment paper, leaving some overhang so you can lift the brownies out later.

2. Brownie base: In a saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat. Once melted, whisk in the sugar until it’s shiny and glossy like you just applied a fresh coat of lip gloss. Let it cool slightly (we don’t want scrambled eggs in our brownies).

3. Add the eggs & vanilla: Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla. At this point, the batter should look like something you want to dive into headfirst.

4. Dry ingredients: In a separate bowl, whisk together flour, cocoa powder, espresso powder, salt, and baking powder. Stir this into the wet mixture until just combined. Do not overmix unless you enjoy eating rubbery brownies (spoiler: you don’t).

5. Bake: Pour the batter into your prepared pan, smooth it out, and bake for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out with fudgy crumbs. Not raw batter, not bone-dry crumbs—fudgy. Trust the process.

6. Cool completely: This is the hardest part. Yes, your kitchen will smell like a chocolate factory. Yes, you will want to dive in face-first. But patience, grasshopper, because ganache needs a cool surface to live its best life.

7. Ganache time: Heat the cream in a small saucepan until it just begins to simmer. Pour it over the chopped chocolate and let it sit for a minute. Stir until smooth, then add the butter and stir again. Congratulations, you just made ganache, aka chocolate magic.

8. Assemble: Pour the ganache over the cooled brownies, spreading it evenly to the edges. Then go full chaos and dump on the sprinkles. As many as your inner child demands. More sprinkles = more joy.

9. Set & slice: Let the ganache set for about an hour (or cheat and pop it in the fridge for 20 minutes if you’re impatient). Lift the brownies out with the parchment overhang, cut into squares, and marvel at your work.

Notes from the Kitchen Table

• These are not “grab one on the way to class” brownies. These are “sit down with a glass of milk and contemplate life choices” brownies.

• The espresso powder doesn’t make them taste like coffee so much as it makes the chocolate taste deeper, richer, and more sophisticated. Like your brownies just put on glasses and started quoting Shakespeare.

• If you don’t like sprinkles, that’s fine. You’re wrong, but it’s fine.

So there you have it: a grown-up cosmic brownie that’s fudgy enough to make you forget calculus exists. Or at least to soften the blow of seeing “differential equations” on your syllabus.

Either way, we win. Because there are brownies.